Written by	Thomas Allen, Harold Brown, Morris Dickerson, Gerald Goldstein, LeRoy Jordan, Lee Levitin, Charles Miller, and Howard Scott
Date	1975
Publisher	Far Out Music

A group of Whatnot soldiers sing a parody of "Why Can't We Be Friends" for the opening number of episode 401 of The Muppet Show. The song was originally a top-ten hit for the group War in 1975.

Outfits include Roman, Musketeers of the Guard, First French Empire (the Napoleonic Wars), Imperial Russian Army, American Civil War, American cowboys and native Americans, and World War I. Crazy Harry appears near the end.