Ernie and Bert Sketches: Miscellaneous

Ernie and Bert sketches against a plain backdrop or some other nondescript location.

1969-1990

Picture	Summary	Earliest Known Appearance	Description
	Balls into Boxes	Episode 0008	Gordon asks Ernie to put three balls and a balloon into four small boxes. When Ernie learns the trick, he tries to play the game with Cookie Monster.
File:E&BMilkCeiling.jpg	Ernie drinks milk on the ceiling	Episode 0016	Ernie is upside down on a ceiling and decides to pour himself a glass of milk on the ceiling. Bert doesn't think that's possible, but Ernie manages.
	Ernie & the Delivery Man	Episode 0038	Ernie tries to help a mailman deliver a letter to Mrs. Mary Ann ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ.
	Ernie Presents the Letter "A"	Episode 0047	Ernie demonstrates the word "apple"; Cookie Monster eats Ernie's apple.
File:Erniebarber.jpg	Ernie's Barber Shop	Episode 0068	Part 1: Ernie is a barber, and gives Bert a haircut. Bert goes bald. Part 2: Ernie tries to disguise Bert until his hair grows back, but a monster (later known as Grover) mistakes Bert for his father. Part 3: Bert has grown his hair back, but now he talks like Cookie Monster. Note: During the 1980s, this sketch was often shown without the second and third parts being shown.
	Broken ukelele	Episode 0080	Part 1: Ernie encounters a sobbing Beautiful Day Monster, who is crying because his ukelele is broken. Ernie shows him a few things one can do with a broken ukelele, but that doesn't stop the monster from crying. Ernie then offers to fix the ukelele. Part 2: Ernie brings back the ukelele, all fixed. And what does the monster do? He eats it! (YouTube)
	Empty box	Episode 0081	Lefty wants to sell Ernie an empty box, explaining that he can fill the box with things like a pet mouse (if Ernie had one) and jellybeans (if they rained from the sky). Ernie wants an empty box, but doesn't have any money. However, Bert brings a box of cookies, and Ernie throws the cookies out so he can catch jellybeans from the sky.
	Air	Episode 0118	Lefty successfully sells Ernie some air, but when Ernie wants to show it to Bert, Bert accidentally causes Ernie to drop it. According to Bert (who didn't know what Ernie had), "It's not like it dropped into thin air". But Ernie insists that it did.
	Missing Chicken Salad Sandwich	Episode 0131	Ernie opens his lunchbox and finds that half of his chicken salad sandwich is missing. Sherlock Hemlock, the world's greatest detective, investigates this fiendish crime. It turns out that Sherlock himself ate half of Ernie's sandwich.
	Seven Balloons	Episode 0168	Ernie tries to count his balloons. The balloons are arranged in a circle, so he continues counting around the circle, and counts some of them twice. Grover has a solution -- he pops each of the balloons as he counts them.
	Ernie and the Yellow Ball	Episode 0263	Ernie finds a big yellow ball, which belongs to Herry Monster.
	Everybody's Different	Episode 0269	Ernie wonders what it would be like if everyone was exaclty the same, and sees four balls who can't discern each other. Ernie decides to help the balls recognize each other by dressing each of them.
	Four Elephants picture	Episode 0278	Lefty the Salesman wants to sell Ernie a painting of a tree, which he says is a picture of four elephants. Ernie doesn't see the four elephants, so Lefty offers to show him the elephants if Ernie will buy the picture for a nickel. Lefty points out the elephants, which are actually spaces in the tree's branches. Ernie shells out for the picture. Ernie wants to pull the same trick on Bert, but Bert notices the elephants right away.
File:EBP.jpg	Block Pyramid	Episode 0406	Ernie asks Bert to keep an eye on his pyramid of blocks. The Count (in his debut appearance) walks by, and counts the blocks, moving them out of the pyramid shape. Then he counts them again, putting them back into the pyramid. Bert yells at the Count for moving Ernie's blocks, so the Count counts the blocks again, taking the pyramid apart.
	The Magic Chain	Episode 0680	Ernie has a so-called "magic" chain which can form into any shape he wants. Bert is dismissive of the chain's magic properties. And yet, when Bert asks for the chain to provide a sandwich, it does.
	Herry's NO Sign	Episode 0701	Herry Monster holds a sign with the word "NO" on it, and tells Ernie that he can make him read his sign, to which Ernie replies "Oh no you can't!" When Ernie gets the joke, he tries it on Bert, but the gag backfires on him when Bert bets he can get Ernie to read the sign.
	Bert's Imagination	Episode 0720	Bert sits outside on the Street, pretending to fly an airplane. Maria sits down with him, and the segment becomes animated as they fly through the air and around the world before returning to the Street.
File:AppleMystery.jpg	Apple Mystery	Episode 0747	Ernie finds an apple on a brick wall, and wants to know who it belongs to. Sherlock Hemlock helps solve the mystery, and realises that Ernie has a brown paper bag with a hole at the bottom, and that Ernie had an apple in the bag, therefore the apple belongs to Ernie.
	Dance music	Episode 0798	Bert and Ernie ask the Kids which music is better -- march or dance music. The kids end up marching off with Bert, while Ernie dances alone.
	What Happens Next?	Episode 0852	Ernie talks about what happens next when he throws a rubber ball, a glass and a watermelon over the wall.
	Touch Your Face	Episode 0869	Ernie plays a game of "Touch Your Face" with the viewer.
	Ernie counts Fruit	Episode 2487	Bert wants to sort his paperclips, but he can't concentrate because Ernie is counting fruit. Bert decides to wait until Ernie is done. This proves to be a bad idea: after counting all the fruits in the bowl, Ernie continues to count all the fruits he has zero of.
	Guess What I'm Thinking of	Episode 2504	Ernie wears socks on his ears and on his nose in order for Bert to guess which body part he's thinking of.
	Ernie Counts Three Honkers	Episode 2596	Ernie counts 3 Honkers as they arrange themselves in different ways.
	Hill Street Twos	Episode 2628	Grover and Ernie star in a parody of Hill Street Blues, where the frustrated police chief has a hard time getting his force to split into pairs of two.
	Bert and Betty Lou Ice Skate	Episode 2847	Full-body versions of Bert and Betty Lou ice skate together.
	Ernie's 12/21 Poem	Episode 3108	Ernie tries to recite a poem about the number 12, but it keeps changing to a 21, forcing him to change his poem.
	Ernie and the R		Ernie and the R.
	Ernie Turns a P into a R		With the help of his magic wand, Ernie shows Bert how to turn the letter P into the letter R.
	Attracting birds		Ernie and Bert notice Mona pretending to be a tree in order to attract birds. However, when Bert tries it, a giant green bird lands on his head.
	Opera		Ernie and Jose Carreras perform an opera about a sad boy (played by Ernie) who's lost something he loves.

Post-1990

Picture	Summary	Earliest Known Appearance	Description
File:Gladyourehere.jpg	Glad You're Here	Episode 3848	A six second segment in which Ernie tells the viewer that he's glad they're there. Rubber Duckie is glad, too.
	Ice Cream		Part 1: Bert missed the ice cream truck. Ernie offers to share his ice cream and runs home to get a bowl, while Bert holds his ice cream. Part 2: Ernie hasn't returned yet, and the ice cream is starting to melt... Part 3: Bert is still waiting for Ernie, and eats the ice cream before it melts all over his arm. Part 4: When Ernie returns, Bert has finished his ice cream and feels very sorry. But Ernie doesn't mind: the ice cream truck passed by the bus stop, so he bought a new cone for himself.
	Goldie-Duckie		Baby Bear plans on eating his bowl of porridge and sees Goldilocks is not around. Ernie wanders by and assures Baby Bear we won't eat his porridge. Baby Bear calms down, until he sees who Ernie has brought with him - Goldie-Duckie.
	Hand On Your Face		Bert and Ernie play "Hand on your Face" and demonstrate what eyes, noses, ears and mouths are for. (Bert even demonstrates his ability to wiggle his ears.)
	Copycat		Ernie repeats everything Bert says and does. Bert gets annoyed and suggests to play the game the other way around, to which Ernie starts talking very fast while patting his head and rubbing his tummy.
	Pretend to be animals	Play with Me Sesame	Ernie gets an idea, that he and Bert should imagine that they are animals. They imagine to be cats, cows and pigeons. Bert is particularly happy about the last one.
	Loud and Quiet (remake)		Ernie wants to demonstrate loud and quite. Ernie starts out yelling. Bert then says something quietly. However Ernie are having trouble hearing what he says and asks him a few times to repeat it. Bert ends up yelling "This is quiet", were Ernie tells him that was not quiet when he yells.
	What Makes Me Happy?		Ernie, Telly, Rosita, The Count and Cookie Monster show the things that make them happy.
File:Folge2418-11.jpg	Oatmeal painting game	Play with Me Sesame	Bert are playing a computer game, Ernie are trying to guess what game he is playing with no luck. Bert tells him he plays the oatmeal painting game.
	Slimey Says	Play with Me Sesame	Ernie and Slimey plays "Slimey says".
	Pigeon game	Play with Me Sesame	Bert plays a game with Pigeons, were he have to match the umbrellas they are holding.
File:Folge2483-9.jpg	Imaginary baseball	Play with Me Sesame	Ernie plays imaginary baseball with the viewer.
	Ernie says	Play with Me Sesame	This time on "Ernie says", Bert has to hold a big cheese that Ernie claims are important for the game, however it makes it hard for Bert to do what Ernie says. After the game, Ernie takes a piece of the cheese as playing makes him hungry.
	Bert's Portrait		Ernie draws a picture of Bert, but with two noses. Ernie becomes sad, as he thinks Bert doesn't like his picture. Bert overlooks the noses and claims he likes Ernie's picture very much, so Ernie gives Bert his Picasso-esque picture of Bert with seven uni brows.
	Trying Oatmeal		Bert is about to eat his oatmeal when Ernie comes by and dismisses the food, claiming to not like it. Bert points out that Ernie's never tried oatmeal and can't say he doesn't like it until he tries it. Ernie tastes the oatmeal, and enjoys it so much that he finishes the whole bowl, leaving nothing for Bert.
	Ice Cream Experiment		Just as the duo is about to dig into their Ice cream, Ernie announces today they will be performing an experiment (which is news to Bert). Ernie test to see what will happen if Bert eats slowly and Ernie eats fast. He makes Bert eats so slowly that before Bert can even try his first bite, Ernie eats his serving before it melts.
	Music and Reading		As Bert tries to read his book, Ernie walks near him with a radio and plays a song loudly. Bert can't read with the music going, so Ernie puts in headphones, but his singing along is just as loud. Ernie suggest they both do something together - dance to the music!
	Bert's Newspaper		Ernie takes Bert's newspaper and turns it into a paper hat and pom-poms.

See also

Ernie and Bert sketches

Cookie Monster sketches

Kermit the Frog sketches

Grover sketches

Herry Monster sketches

Count von Count sketches

Elmo sketches

Big Bird sketches