Ernie and Bert Sketches: Miscellaneous
From Muppet Wiki
1969-1990
| Picture | Summary | Earliest Known Appearance | Description |
|---|---|---|---|
 | Balls into Boxes | Episode 0008 | Gordon asks Ernie to put three balls and a balloon into four small boxes. When Ernie learns the trick, he tries to play the game with Cookie Monster. |
 | Ernie drinks milk on the ceiling | Episode 0016 | Ernie is upside down on a ceiling and decides to pour himself a glass of milk on the ceiling. Bert doesn't think that's possible, but Ernie manages. |
 | A Letter For Ernie | Episode 0038 | Ernie tries to help a mailman deliver a letter to Ms. Marian ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ. |
 | Ernie Presents the Letter "A" | Episode 0047 | Ernie demonstrates the word "apple"; Cookie Monster eats Ernie's apple.
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 | Ernie Presents the Letter "U" | Episode 0047 | Ernie demonstrates a ukelele; Cookie Monster plays Tiptoe Through the Tulips on Ernie's ukelele, then eats it.
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 | Ernie's Barber Shop | Episode 0068 | Part 1: Ernie is a barber, and gives Bert a haircut. Bert goes bald. Part 2: Ernie tries to disguise Bert until his hair grows back, but a monster (later known as Grover) mistakes Bert for his father. |
 | Broken ukelele | Episode 0080 | Part 1: Ernie encounters a sobbing Beautiful Day Monster, who is crying because his ukelele is broken. Ernie shows him a few things one can do with a broken ukelele, but that doesn't stop the monster from crying. Ernie then offers to fix the ukelele. Part 2: Ernie brings back the ukelele, all fixed. And what does the monster do? He eats it! |
 | Empty box | Episode 0081 | Lefty wants to sell Ernie an empty box, explaining that he can fill the box with things like a pet mouse (if Ernie had one) and jellybeans (if they rained from the sky). Ernie wants an empty box, but doesn't have any money. However, Bert brings a box of cookies, and Ernie throws the cookies out so he can catch jellybeans from the sky.
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 | Air | Episode 0118 | Lefty successfully sells Ernie some air, but when Ernie wants to show it to Bert, Bert accidentally causes Ernie to drop it. According to Bert (who didn't know what Ernie had), "It's not like it dropped into thin air". But Ernie insists that it did.
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 | Missing Chicken Salad Sandwich | Episode 0131 | Ernie opens his lunchbox and finds that half of his chicken salad sandwich is missing. Sherlock Hemlock, the world's greatest detective, investigates this fiendish crime. It turns out that Sherlock himself ate half of Ernie's sandwich. |
 | Seven Balloons | Episode 0168 | Ernie tries to count his balloons. The balloons are arranged in a circle, so he continues counting around the circle, and counts some of them twice. Grover has a solution -- he pops each of the balloons as he counts them. |
 | The Magic Apple | Episode 0179 | Bob reads a story which is acted out by Ernie, Bert and three Anything Muppets. Ernie plays a "poor but honest farm boy" who would like to marry a princess and live in a palace with Rubber Duckies and banana milkshakes. A fairy godmother grants him that wish, but only if he can pick a magic apple from a tree. A farmer attempts to help him get the apple, but doesn't succeed. Finally, Ernie rests under the tree until the apple falls into his mouth! Just then, a king arrives and chooses Ernie to marry his daughter, "the lovely princess Gwendolynda" (Bert in drag). |
| Hope | Episode 0233 | Ernie and Cookie Monster discuss hope. Ernie has something in a brown paper bag, and asks Cookie Monster what he hopes it is. Cookie Monster hopes that it is a cookie. It turns out that Ernie has ten cookies in the bag. |
 | Cookie Matching | Episode 0261 | Ernie tries to find another cookie with a criss-cross of icing. He has trouble matching cookies, but Cookie "matches" them by eating them (putting them all in the same place, his stomach) |
 | Ernie and the Yellow Ball | Episode 0263 | Ernie finds a big yellow ball, which belongs to Herry Monster. |
 | Four Elephants picture | Episode 0278 | Lefty the Salesman wants to sell Ernie a painting of a tree, which he says is a picture of four elephants. Ernie doesn't see the four elephants, so Lefty offers to show him the elephants if Ernie will buy the picture for a nickel. Lefty points out the elephants, which are actually spaces in the tree's branches. Ernie shells out for the picture. Ernie wants to pull the same trick on Bert, but Bert notices the elephants right away.
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 | Counting Apples | Episode 0292 | Ernie has four apples, and wants to draw the number 4, showing that he has four apples. However, Cookie Monster wants to eat an apple, so Ernie crosses out the 4 and draws a 3. Then Cookie Monster decides not to eat the apple, causing Ernie to have to cross out the 4 again and draw another 3, over and over again.
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| | Tall,Taller, and Tallest | Episode 0303 | Ernie, Bert and Big Bird demonstrate tall, taller and tallest. |
 | Block Pyramid | Episode 0406 | Ernie asks Bert to keep an eye on his pyramid of blocks. The Count walks by, and counts the blocks, moving them out of the pyramid shape. Then he counts them again, putting them back into the pyramid. Bert yells at the Count for moving Ernie's blocks, so the Count counts the blocks again, taking the pyramid apart. |
 | The Magic Chain | Episode 0680 | Ernie has a so-called "magic" chain which can form into any shape he wants. Bert is dismissive of the chain's magic properties. And yet, when Bert asks for the chain to provide a sandwich, it does. |
 | Herry's NO Sign | Episode 0701 | Herry Monster holds a sign with the word "NO" on it, and tells Ernie that he can make him read his sign, to which Ernie replies "Oh no you can't!" When Ernie gets the joke, he tries it on Bert, but the gag backfires on him when Bert bets he can get Ernie to read the sign. |
| | Bert's Imagination | Episode 0720 | Bert sits outside on the Street, pretending to fly an airplane. Maria sits down with him, and the segment becomes animated as they fly through the air and around the world before returning to the Street. |
 | Apple Mystery | Episode 0747 | Ernie finds an apple on a brick wall, and wants to know who it belongs to. Sherlock Hemlock helps solve the mystery, and realises that Ernie has a brown paper bag with a hole at the bottom, and that Ernie had an apple in the bag, therefore the apple belongs to Ernie.
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| | Dance music | Episode 0798 | Bert and Ernie ask the Kids which music is better -- march or dance music. The kids end up marching off with Bert, while Ernie dances alone. |
| | What Happens Next ? | Episode 0852 | Ernie talks about what happens next when he throws a rubber ball, a glass and a watermelon over the wall. |
 | Touch Your Face | Episode 0869 | Ernie plays a game of "Touch Your Face" with the viewer. |
| | Ball Team | Episode 0944 | Ernie is a coach for his baseball team (three balls) hats before the game starts. He brings in three small caps and a huge yellow cap , however when the balls try on the big cap it covered each one up. Ernie ends up putting the small caps and there ready to start. Ernie wonders where that huge cap came from and in bounced a basketball (captain of the opposing team) demanding his cap back. Ernie ends up postponing the game once he sees his competition. |
 | Ernie counts Fruit | Episode 2487 | Bert wants to sort his paperclips, but he can't concentrate because Ernie is counting fruit. Bert decides to wait until Ernie is done. This proves to be a bad idea: after couting all the fruits in the bowl, Ernie continues to count all the fruits he has zero of. |
 | Ernie Counts Three Honkers | Episode 2596 | Ernie counts 3 Honkers as they arrange themselves in different ways.
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 | Ernie and the R | Ernie and the R. | |
 | Ernie Dresses Balls | Ernie sees four balls but they can't discern each other. Ernie decides to help the balls recognize each other by dressing each of them. | |
 | Peppermint Sticks | Ernie and Farley are about to eat peppermint stick candy, but Cookie Monster passes by and points out that Ernie's is longer than Farley's, and Farley's is shorter. Cookie solves the problem by eating each stick, each time making the other one longer. He finally gets them the right size--but they are now eaten down to small stubs. | |
| | Bert and Betty Lou Ice Skate | Full-body versions of Bert and Betty Lou ice skate together. | |
 | Ernie Turns a P into a R | With the help of his magic wand, Ernie shows Bert how to turn the letter P into the letter R. | |
 | Attracting birds | Ernie and Bert notice Mona pretending to be a tree in order to attract birds. However, when Bert tries it, a giant green bird lands on his head. | |
 | Guess What I'm Thinking of | Ernie wears socks on his ears and on his nose in order for Bert to guess which body part he's thinking of.
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Post-1990
| Picture | Summary | Earliest Known Appearance | Description |
|---|---|---|---|
 | Glad You're Here | Episode 3848 | A six second segment in which Ernie tells the viewer that he's glad they're there. Rubber Duckie is glad, too. |
 | Ice Cream | Part 1: Bert missed the ice cream truck. Ernie offers to share his ice cream and runs home to get a bowl, while Bert holds his ice cream. Part 2: Ernie hasn't returned yet, and the ice cream is starting to melt... | |
| | Hand On Your Face | Bert and Ernie play "Hand on your Face" and demonstrate what eyes, noses, ears and mouths are for. (Bert even demonstrates his ability to wiggle his ears.) | |
| | Copycat | Ernie repeats everything Bert says and does. Bert gets annoyed and suggests to play the game the other way around, to which Ernie starts talking very fast while patting his head and rubbing his tummy. | |
 | Pretend to be animals | Play with Me Sesame | Ernie gets an idea, that he and Bert should imagine that they are animals. They imagine to be cats, cows and pigeons. Bert is particularly happy about the last one. (YouTube) |
| | Bert's Fairy Tales: Sleeping Beauty | Bert portrays Prince Charming, who wakes up Sleeping Beauty, but then puts her to sleep again when he starts talking to her about his paper clips.
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 | Loud and Quiet (remake) | Ernie wants to demonstrate loud and quite. Ernie starts out yelling. Bert then says something quietly. However Ernie are having trouble hearing what he says and asks him a few times to repeat it. Bert ends up yelling "This is quiet", were Ernie tells him that was not quiet when he yells. | |
 | Ernie Protects the Cookie | In this Letter of the Day sketch, Cookie Monster enlists the help of Ernie to protect the letter "A" cookie. Cookie warns him that he will be very tempted, and beg and cry for the cookie (even resorting to telling Ernie's mommy), but no matter what, Ernie should not give it to him. However, Ernie does give in and give him the cookie simply because Cookie politely asks for it.
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