|The Muppet Show|
|Guest Starring|| Kris Kristofferson|
|Production Dates||February 14-16, 1978|
|Home Video||Season 3|
In the canteen, Gladys and the Swedish Chef serve up food to the Muppet cast. Miss Piggy orders the weight watcher's special, and she's annoyed when rival Annie Sue orders a hamburger and apple pie. Animal orders a TV dinner, which turns out to be a real TV.
Meanwhile, Gonzo tries to capitalize on a failed stunt by selling his autographs. Now that everyone thinks he's dead, they'll be worth a fortune!
- "Help Me Make It Through the Night"
- Muppet Labs: Elevator Shoes
- "My Wild Irish Rose"
- Muppet News Flash: Missing Silverware
- "We're All Alone"
- UK Spot: "A Frog He Would A-Wooing Go"
- "New York State of Mind"
- A chicken plays the chimes
- "Hi-Diddle-Dee-Dee (An Actor's Life for Me)"
- "Song I Like to Sing"
|Guest stars Rita Coolidge and Kris Kristofferson tell Scooter that they don't mind sharing a dressing room. Scooter takes this as an opportunity to invite several monsters in.|
|"The Muppet Show Theme": Gonzo gets the hiccups when he tries to play his trumpet.|
|Miss Piggy interrupts Kermit's introduction to ask that he not be jealous despite the sexiness of the opening number. She then assures Kermit that, no matter what happens, it is him that she loves.|
|Kris Kristofferson and Miss Piggy sing a duet of "Help Me Make It Through the Night," backed up by The Electric Mayhem. Statler and Waldorf's response to the song is a quick rendition of "Wonderful Copenhagen."|
|Gonzo, in the canteen, asks Gladys for the soup du jour (which is the same as yesterday) along with a chicken – not to eat, but for company. When Gladys returns with his food, she tells him he can pay her later, but quickly changes her mind when she discovers the nature of his next act.|
|Gonzo's stunts: Gonzo recites the seven-times tables while standing on a hammock and balancing a piano: "Seven times one is...seven! Seven times two is...seventeen!-Wait, let me count that." Gonzo, only having 5 fingers, lets go of the piano...|
|Muppet Labs: Dr. Bunsen Honeydew reveals his latest invention, perfect for "short, stubby" people like Beaker - Atomic Elevator Shoes. Bunsen then uses the device to add "untold inches to Beaker's unfortunate physique."|
|Wayne sings "My Wild Irish Rose" and is promptly attacked by it.|
| ||Miss Piggy orders a watercress sandwich on whole wheat with four ounces of rhubarb juice, otherwise known as the "Fatso Special." Piggy then becomes jealous of the more petite Annie Sue who orders a chocolate milkshake, a hamburger with french fries, and an apple pie with cream, the "Kamikaze Special."|
|Muppet News Flash: An update on the Henderson burglary: All of the stolen items have been recovered... except for the silverware.|
|Backstage, Piggy reminds Kermit that Kris Kristofferson and Rita Coolidge are happily married, showing that you can combine show business careers and marriage. She then offers him six months in the hospital as time to think about it.|
|Rita sings her solo hit "We're All Alone" with some forest friends.|
|UK Spot: Rowlf performs "A Frog He Would A-Wooing Go" with commentary by Sam the Eagle. Neither one really understands the song.|
| || Kris confides in Rita about how everything on the show walks and talks - animals, vegetables, and even minerals, as a rock is kind enough to remind him.|
Gonzo gives Kris and Rita his autograph, which is really valuable after his failed piano balancing act: "A lot of people think I'm dead now!"
|Floyd Pepper, Dr. Teeth, and Zoot perform "New York State of Mind." (Repeated from episode 209)|
|A chicken plays the chimes.|
| ||Floyd and Gladys share a few lousy puns about food and cooking, and then reveal the nature of Animal's TV dinner.|
|Rowlf and Fozzie perform "Hi-Diddle-Dee-Dee (An Actor's Life for Me)."|
|Kris and Rita sing "Song I Like to Sing."|
|At the closing, Gonzo carries on the charade that he is dead by having two chickens carry him across the stage under a sheet. His autographs are sure to be worth a fortune.|
- This episode marks the first appearance of the Muppet Theater's canteen, as well as that of its proprietress, Gladys.
- A clip of Gonzo's piano-balancing act appears at the beginning of The Muppets.
- Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Gonzo, Scooter, Rowlf the Dog, Statler and Waldorf, Gladys, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Beaker, Wayne, Annie Sue, The Newsman, Sam the Eagle, Floyd Pepper, Dr. Teeth, Zoot, Animal, Rock, Pig, Chickens
- Timmy Monster, Mean Mama, Luncheon Counter Monster, Sweetums, Janice, Afghan Hound, Muppy, The Swedish Chef, Wild Irish Rose, Harrison Fox, James Badger, Billy the Bear, Deer, Nat Muskrat, Beaver, Will Possum, Ferret, Woodland Animals, the Hatrack, Umbrella Stand, Umbrellas, Whatnots
- Jim Henson as Kermit the Frog, Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Newsman and Waldorf
- Frank Oz as Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Sam the Eagle, Animal and Stagehand
- Jerry Nelson as Floyd Pepper and Pig
- Richard Hunt as Gladys, Scooter, Beaker, Wayne, Statler and Sweetums
- Dave Goelz as Gonzo, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Zoot
- Louise Gold as Annie Sue
|Previous episode:||Next episode:|
|Cloris Leachman||Leo Sayer|