Episode 103: Billy Crystal

Muppets Tonight
Air Date	March 22, 1996
Written by	Dick Blasucci, Paul Flaherty, Darin Henry, Jim Lewis, Kirk Thatcher and Patric Verrone
Director	Gary Halvorson

File:WhenHarryMetSallyScreenTest.jpg

Miss Piggy auditions for the role of Sally in When Harry Met Sally.

Clifford hires Bobo the Bear as the stations security guard. Clifford tells Bobo that he should only let people in whose names are on the list. However, after telling him this, Bobo won't let Clifford in to host the show, but quickly does when he reminds Bobo that he won't get paid if Clifford's name isn't on his paycheck.

Backstage, Billy Crystal tells the cast and crew that he'd like to appear in an old-fashioned jazz number, and has a jazz band prepared. Sam the Eagle comes to Clifford with a crisis: It's almost time for the premier of his new segment, The Eagle's Nest, and Sam's two scheduled guests, Larry King and Mr. Poodlepants, have not shown up yet, and is desperate to have anybody as guests. Clifford notices Andy and Randy Pig causing havoc in the controll room, and has them go on as guests. During this time, Larry King shows up, but Bobo won't let him in, due to not seeing his name on the list (Mr. Poodlepants does eventually show up for the segment).

Later, Johnny Fiama and Sal Manilla show up, but Johnny Fiama's name is not on the list. Sal insults Bobo over this, leading to Bobo beating him, but Johnny soon double-checks his appointment book and sees that he's not scheduled for that night's show after all.

Eventually, it's time for the closing number, and Billy's band has not shown up yet. However, Billy tells the cast that they can be the jazz band, and they perform the song "Now You Has Jazz". After the show is over, the cast wonders what happened to the band, and it's revealed that Bobo wouldn't let them in (due to them being a last-minute addition, and therefore not being on the list).

Skit Highlights

• Miss Piggy's When Harry Met Sally screen test
• "The Lion Sleeps Tonight"
• The Eagle's Nest - Taxes
• City Schtickers
• The Tubmans of Porksmith
• "Now You Has Jazz"

Episode

Picture	Description
	Clifford explains to the new doorman, Bobo the Bear, the studio's policy: only let people in if they're on the list. When Clifford tries to enter, Bobo stops him, claiming he's not on the list. Clifford reminds him of his high status in the studio and is let in.
	Clifford introduces Billy Crystal, who hasn't let stardom go to his head. Billy then enters being carried by some pigs while dressed in a body-builder's outfit and thinks he's on American Gladiators, but reveals he's kidding. He then presents a secret screen test from When Harry Met Sally with a familiar co-star.
File:WhenHarryMetSallyScreenTest.jpg	In a re-enactment of the infamous deli scene from When Harry Met Sally, Billy tells Miss Piggy about how his date canceled because of a cold, claiming she even sneezed over the phone. Miss Piggy demonstrates how women do a fake sneeze with an over-blown performance.
	Nigel shows Andy and Randy how to operate the house lights with the push of a button, but instead they press a different one that blows part of the control panel off and whacking Nigel in the face. The rest of the Muppets beg Billy to do some impressions for them, including Muhammad Ali and Sammy Davis Jr. Clifford suggests that be part of the closing number, but Billy would rather do a jazz number and even has a band on the way. Dr. Phil Van Nuter then arrives and finds a damaged Nigel and finds him perfect for some reconstructive surgery.
	Jungle animals sing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" while a lion tries to get some rest. He can't take anymore of the song and chases the singers offstage.
	The animals run over Clifford on their way out of the lion's clutch. Sam the Eagle then approaches Clifford with a problem: his editorial show is almost on and his two correspondents (Larry King and Mr. Poodlepants) have yet to arrive. Clifford sets him up with two other guests instead.
	Meanwhile, at the studio entrance, Larry King arrives, but Bobo can't find his name on the list. Larry tries explain his stardom, claiming to be on in 220 countries. Bobo knows better, knowing there are only 191 countries and takes out a globe to show him.
	Sam hosts "The Eagle's Nest", where he, Andy and Randy will be discussing "taxes". But, Andy and Randy have a misunderstanding about bills, thinking he's calling them Bill. Mr. Poodlepants then arrives, thinking they're talking about Texas ("The Longhorn State!") He pulls out an Alpine horn that summons an avalanche onto Sam.
	Back downstairs, Bobo continues counting countries, but a small debate with Larry over one makes him loose his place.
	Kermit, Fozzie and Billy appear in "City Schtickers" as three comedians in the old west. They exchange some puns and sing "Ragtime Cowboy Joe". The cows can't take much more and start a stampede.
	In their nursing home, Statler calls the sketch "breathless" and calls his nurse for his medicine. The nurse blows him up.
	UK Spot: The Tubmans of Porksmith Howard receives a telegram that his aunt has passed away and he will inherit her fortune if he looses weight soon. Howard his the treadmill, but finds he's making no progress. Carter receives another message that his aunt pulled through anyway.
	Sal and Jonny arrive and Sal acts disrespectfully toward Bobo to let Johnny in, insulting him enough times to earn himself a beating. Johnny finds he's not even on the show tonight and Sal is thrown into the street.
File:MT103-14.jpg	Clifford and Rizzo break the bad news to Billy: his band hasn't arrived yet. Billy isn't beat, and shows them how they can make their own jazz tune, leading into an onstage performance of "Now You Has Jazz."
	Billy and the group gather around to say goodnight and wonder what happened to his band.
	We see Billy's band (consisting of several celebrity look-alikes) are held up by Bobo, not finding them on the list.

Trivia

• Larry King said that his show was on in 220 countries, but Bobo countered that there were only 191 countries. Bobo was, in fact, correct; at the time the episode aired, there were only 191 countries in the world.

• Larry King refers to the show as "The Muppet Show".

• This is the first episode of Muppets Tonight that Fozzie Bear and Sam the Eagle appeared in. It also features the first appearances of Johnny Fiama, and Sal Minella. Bobo the Bear, though seen earlier, is properly introduced in this episode.

• When Bobo tosses Sal out of the building, Johnny comments, "That is one nutty way to stop a cab." It must be: Gonzo did the same thing in The Great Muppet Caper.

• This episode was production number 104.

• Actor Johnny Depp was mentioned as being on Bobo's list.

• Sal makes references to Yogi Bear and Smokey.

Performers

Kevin Clash as Clifford, Carter and Paul Revere

Frank Oz as Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Animal, Sam the Eagle, and the Lion.

Steve Whitmire as Kermit the Frog, Rizzo the Rat, Andy Pig, and Mr. Poodlepants.

Bill Barretta as Bobo the Bear, Johnny Fiama, and Howard Tubman.

Brian Henson as Sal Minella, Nigel, Dr. Phil van Neuter, and Seymour.

Dave Goelz as Randy Pig and Waldorf.

Jerry Nelson as Horse, Statler, and Rob Reiner Muppet.

Cast

Muppets:

Clifford, Bobo the Bear, Rizzo the Rat, Andy Pig, Randy Pig, Johnny Fiama, Sal Minella, Miss Piggy, Sam the Eagle, Kermit the Frog, Fozzie Bear, Animal, Nigel the Director, Chuck the Lion, Mr. Poodlepants, Dr. Phil van Neuter, Seymour, Howard Tubman, Carter, Paul Revere

Background Muppets:

Randall the Zebra, Zoot, Link Hogthrob, David Hoggselhoff, Dkembe the Gemsbok, Phoenicia the Hippopotamus, Bernice the Warthog, Billybob the Lemur, Bosko the Baboon, Trudy the Chimpanzee, Alfonso D'Bruzzo, Forcryingoutloud Bird, Horses, Cows

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